


Stay

by dancer4eva



Category: Criminal Minds (US TV)
Genre: F/M, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-06
Updated: 2019-04-06
Packaged: 2020-01-05 19:36:18
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 858
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18372695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/dancer4eva/pseuds/dancer4eva
Summary: Just a drabble written to Sugarland's "Stay".





	Stay

It had been a long case this time. Cases involving little kids were always the worst; JJ was right. Without Derek on the team any longer, it seems the hard cases were getting harder. Slowly, everything was falling apart. Derek had promised him, though, that should Spencer ever need him, Derek would always be there. After some time, being there began to take on a whole new meaning.

A few months ago, after a similarly hard case, Derek came by. Beers and a movie turned into making out, which eventually turned in making love. No, into sex. Spencer won’t call it making love; Derek is still with Savanah.

 Tonight, nothing had changed. Spencer came home and Derek was waiting for him—he must have known it was bad from the lack of texts between the two. Spencer couldn’t fall asleep. Derek laid beside him, snoring. And Spencer just waited.

 _I've been sittin' here, starin' at the clock on the wall_  
_And I've been layin' here, prayin'_  
 _Prayin' she won't call_  
 _It's just another call from home, and you'll get it_  
 _And be gone, and I'll be cryin'_

_And I'll be beggin' you, baby_   
_Beg you not to leave_   
_But I'll be left here waitin'_   
_My heart on my sleeve_   
_Oh, for the next time we'll be here_   
_Seems like a million years, and I think I'm dyin'_

_What do I have to do to make you see_   
_She can't love you like me?_

There is was. Derek’s phone lit up. Savanah’s first message. Probably along the lines of “Good night. I love you. Don’t stay at Spencer’s too late.” Spencer knew, because it always said the same thing. But Derek was asleep. Give a minute. Ah. The call. Spencer already had Derek’s clothes laid out and his things repacked. Spencer may be Derek’s Pretty Boy, but he isn’t enough to make him stay.

  _Why don't you stay?_  
_I'm down on my knees_  
 _I'm so tired of bein' lonely_  
 _Don't I give you what you need?_  
 _When she calls you to go_  
 _There is one thing you should know_  
 _We don't have to live this way_  
 _Baby, why don't you stay?_

 A few months later, Derek came over, out of the blue. There hadn’t been a case. Spencer wasn’t craving, so he knew neither JJ nor Garcia called him. Derek brought beer and a movie. But before the film even began, broke down. Spencer’s heart stops when Derek says “I’m leaving her.” When? Is all Spencer can think. Derek seems to read his mind when he adds, “Soon.” So never, is Spencer’s internal reply.

  _You keep tellin' me, baby_  
 _There will come a time_  
 _When you will leave her arms_  
 _And forever be in mine_  
 _But I don't think that's the truth_  
 _And I don't like bein' used, and I'm tired of waitin'_

_It's too much pain to have to bear  
To love a man you have to share_

Spencer dutifully waits. Derek has promised. Next time Derek comes around, Spencer asks. When? Spencer screams “I love you!” at Derek. But Derek keeps promising, soon. That night, Spencer lies awake, waiting for the call. This though, he’s ready to beg Derek not to leave. His tears, his words, nothing sways Derek.

  _Why don't you stay?_  
_I'm down on my knees_  
 _I'm so tired of bein' lonely_  
 _Don't I give you what you need?_  
 _When she calls you to go_  
 _There is one thing you should know_  
 _We don't have to live this way_  
 _Baby, why don't you stay?_

 It’s another hard case. This time, he knows Garcia will call Derek. No one suspects a thing—just that nothing makes him feel better than Derek. But this time, Spencer’s prepared. He’s changed the locks on the door. He’s bought sound cancelling headphones. And the biggest tissue pack he could find. Derek won’t be getting through tonight.

  _I can't take it any longer, but my will is gettin' stronger_  
_And I think I know just what I have to do_  
 _I can't waste another minute_  
 _After all that I've put in it_  
 _I've given you my best_  
 _Why does she get the best of you?_

_So next time you find you wanna leave her bed for mine_

It feels like he’s dying. Spencer has locked him out. He can’t blame him. Derek knows he’s the bad guy this time. But leaving Savanah would create too many problems. But not having Spencer may be his punishment for not loving him the way he should have.

 It feels like he’s dying. He’s locked out Derek. It takes every ounce of self-control, self-control Derek helped him find after his addiction, to not open that door. He loves Derek; oh, how he loves him. But Derek prefers to hide behind Savanah than to love him. And Spencer is finally strong enough to want to be loved right.

  _Why don't you stay?_  
_I'm up off my knees_  
 _I'm so tired of bein' lonely_  
 _You can't give me what I need_  
 _When she begs you not to go_  
 _There is one thing you should know_  
 _I don't have to live this way_

_Baby, why don't you stay?_


End file.
